Sunday, August 23, 2009

Star Trek: The Next Generation--"The Dauphin"

Wesley falls in love with a pretty girl who turns out to be a slobbering monster. He is lucky. Usually, you have to marry a woman before you find out she is actually a vicious creature aiming to rip your throat out if the toilet seat is left up. If only Wesley could have turned into a monster, too. Then they not only could have wound up happy together, but befriended a donkey that sounds a lot like Eddie Murphy.

The Enterprise is escorting Salia, an exiled leader, and her guardian, Anya, back to her war torn home planet Her return is supposed to bring a lasting peace, but when ahe spots Wesley, that plan goes out the window. He is smitten with her, too, like I imagine he would be anything female who can look past his Steve Urkel qualities.

Anya looks to be little more than a nanny figure to Salia, fretting over how unsafe the ship is. After Pulaski refuses to kill a sick patient in order to protect Salia fro illness, she reveals herself to be the creature pictured above. Oh, boy. Yet another chance Pulaski may die a horrible, bloody death. No such thing, though. Darn. Worf battles Anya into a stalemate.

Meanwhile, Wesley, after bad sex advice from Riker and Worf, starts macking on Salia. To the surprise of everyone in the audience, she wants to stay on the Enterprise With him. They smooch.

While Wesley presumably changes his underwear, Anya refuses to allow the budding romance. Picard forbids Wesley to see Salia, too. But she sneaks out to see him in his room. Anya finds her there. Salia finally turns into a monster, too, and they battle each other. Over Wesley.

Wesley is hurt over the deception or that he has to wait three more seasons for Ashley Judd to show up. I am not certain exactly which. Salia and Anya leave while wesley goes back to his science projects. Is that not just the way? He finally finds a girl who thinks he is great and she turns out to be Gossamer from Loony Tunes.There is nothing fundamentally wrong with this episode, but there is not much to recommend it, either. Even the one of two Wesley fans out there have to be disappointed with how his character is treated here. Heck, I cannot stand him and I still felt sympathy.

Rating: ** (out of 5)

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